During the trip to the shooting range that was described in the last post, I had an opportunity to observe a life principle that has been developing in my mind for quite some time. I am not sure when I fully realized the principle that is the basis for this post, but there have been several examples over the past couple of weeks that have helped fully flesh it out in my mind.
While we were having our usual skill builder training session, two new shooters were receiving, what appeared to be, their first shooting lesson. The contrast between the two groups of shooters was obvious. The experienced shooters needed minimal instruction and set high standards for themselves. The new shooters needed to be taught about some fundamentals of shooting such as grip and sight alignment. The experienced shooters were aiming at an 8-inch bullseye target from 25 yards away while the new shooters were struggling to consistently hit a full-sized silhouette target, which is 3-4 times larger, from 10 yards away.
I was reminded of my own shooting abilities, which were similarly basic, prior to attending the police academy. I was not born with the innate ability to shoot accurately like I had assumed. The only difference between my shooting abilities then and now was numerous hours of practice. I wish that I could know exactly how many hours I have spent shooting during the course of my career this far, but I know it is over 200. While there is some allowance for personal abilities and innate talent, much of the reason why I shot better than the new shooters were the time spent perfecting the craft. These new shooters are on the same path as I am, but we are in different places on the journey. Until this week I had applied my realization of this concept to myself, anything is possible if I am willing to spend time needed to develop the skills.
As alluded to in the 10,000-hour rule, if I want to become a good jiu jitsu practitioner I need to put the time in. The only difference between a black belt and I is that the black belt has dedicated years of their life to jiu jitsu. I have started my way along the path of jiu jitsu but have not progressed as far as most. Of course, the time spent developing this skill needs to be effectively spent to continue progressing. I cannot simply show up and expect to improve through osmosis. If I want to improve my ability in making small talk or in being a better “people person” I need to spend time intentionally trying to improve these skills. I had not realized, until this week, that this same principle could be applied to others as well.
There isn’t any reason for a new shooter to be discouraged when they notice that they aren’t as well developed as somebody else. They should, in fact, be encouraged when they see what possibilities exist if they continue the path they have chosen. This is where finding the right teacher can be critical. Often the next step on the journey isn’t obvious to the inexperienced individual. A teacher, instructor, tutor, mentor, or coach’s job is to help guide people during this journey. A new jiu jitsu practitioner has no clue about the various moves that need to be learned and therefore must be shown the way.
My job, as a conscientious member of society, is to help others that are on a path I have already travelled. This includes, as I realized this week, in helping others who may not be as far down the path on a social, or leadership perspective. Sometimes it is easy to see someone fall short in an area that we have already figured out. Rather than let them flounder in their own mistakes, I need to use my influence to help them continue to progress. This does not mean that I need to turn into the person who is always pointing out others’ flaws. There is no need for me to share my observations with anyone other than the person whom I can help. As usual, the indirect method is preferable to confronting someone directly by telling them what their shortcomings are.
It is easy to make our way through life criticizing others’ shortcomings. The difficult part is building my relationship with those I come into contact with so that they are willing to listen when I share my opinions with them. It is much harder to come up with solutions to problems rather than just identify where improvement can be made. Humility is a key component of approaching situations like this in a proper manner and I would benefit to keep the proper perspective. The only reason that I have the ability to identify someone’s mistakes is due to the fact that I have committed those mistakes before. Just because I am in a further point on the journey does not make me better or make them worse. They are simply walking a path that I have already travelled in this one area. There is certainly another area where they are further down the path than I, and I hope that they would be willing to share some guidance with me in return.
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